This might be a weird one but…
Is it a sin to lust after your spouse?
Marriage seems like the one place where that kind of passion would be welcomed, and I still picked up guilt about it somewhere along the way.
This might be a weird one but…
Is it a sin to lust after your spouse?
Marriage seems like the one place where that kind of passion would be welcomed, and I still picked up guilt about it somewhere along the way.
No. I don’t think it’s a sin to want your spouse. The guilt showed up in me the same way you describe, so bring it to Him.
I carried the same guilt into my own marriage, from years of hearing that desire itself was dangerous. No, your spouse is the one person the word lust doesn’t apply to. Song of Songs is in the Bible for a reason.
No. Wanting your spouse a lot isn’t a sin.
Being married doesn’t mean you’re owed anything though. If the wanting turns into pressure, or you stop paying attention to whether your spouse is into it, that’s where it goes wrong.
If it’s bringing you closer and you’re both happy with it, I don’t see anything to feel guilty about.
If God put fire into the canon, the glow between two people who belong to each other is supposed to be there.
My spouse and I started reading it aloud together and the knot low in my belly let go. I hadn’t realized I’d been waiting on permission for that.
Whether your spouse is actually into it, that’s the real test, and checking in more often has helped us a lot.
Yeah as long as you are both happy (I assume you would be) I don’t see why there would be a problem.
Daily desire for my spouse is just marriage working the way it should. But feeling that way about someone else, that would be the problem.
The way Scripture defines it, or seems to, lust is desire directed specifically at someone who isn’t your spouse. Which would mean it can’t apply within marriage, not by definition anyway.
No guilt needed. Desiring the person God gave you, your own spouse, is the one place that kind of fire belongs.
If that were wrong, marriage wouldn’t make much sense at all.
God built that fire into marriage because it was meant to be enjoyed.
Sex within marriage is his gift. The attraction you feel toward your spouse is part of what makes it intimate.
The guilt you picked up isn’t from him.
Person or object. The love between you and your spouse should be about giving and wanting what’s best for them as a whole person, rather than viewing their body as something for your own pleasure.
If the desire crosses into objectifying territory, that can be problematic.
Scripture encourages you not to withhold from each other except for prayer and fasting, and that guilt you picked up doesn’t line up with what God designed marriage to be. The passion you feel for your spouse is covenant love.
Lust is only when it’s someone who isn’t yours, my grandmother used to say (her words, more or less). Marriage is the one place that fire belongs and wanting your own spouse is exactly how He intended it.
It depends which ‘lust’ you mean. Some mean strong sexual desire, while others mean wanting someone’s body without caring about the rest of them.
I don’t think marriage makes that second kind impossible. The useful question is whether you’re enjoying your spouse as a whole person or what they do for you.
Enjoying desire is one thing. Letting it run your day and crowd out responsibilities is another, which is where self-control comes in.
Marital passion isn’t dirty. Good desires sometimes need a “later” instead of right now.
The guilt still being there worries me a little. Mine was old shame from before marriage that never got dealt with, a Christian counselor helped me untangle it.
Sounds more like desire than lust, to me anyway. Desire for your spouse is a gift.